These past few weeks have been a real struggle for me as my body acclimates to all the medications I am on. They make me nauseous, I have experienced swelling in my face, I wake up every morning with BAGS under my eyes, I am fatigued and the reality is I just feel GROSS.
As I have been praying and meditating on what I need to write about this writing I wrote back when I was in seminary kept laying heavy on my heart and as I talked to someone trustworthy and safe today it hit me like a ton of bricks why. The ugliness I have been feeling has set off constant triggers within me. Nothing I am doing or have been doing has changed, but I am gaining weight and feel so uncomfortable in my own skin. The inner most part of me wants to run and hide but what am I running from? I can’t run and I can’t hide. So here I am, open, vulnerable and transparent laying my soul out there knowing I will be judged and labeled. Here is the reality, I am thin and always have been thin. There was a season of my life where I did battle the ugly head of an eating disorder and this thorn in my flesh is a cross I bare and need to carry. I have walked through and I believe I have been healed of this disorder but I am not going to sit here and say I never struggle, I never get triggered and that I never feel fat and ugly because that would be a lie. The reality is I do struggle at times, I do get triggered and I do feel less than attractive at moments. But, and I say that because there is a BIG BUT, I am real with these feeling and emotions and I go before the Lord with them . I know they are not spirits of the Lord and they are from the enemy trying to tear me and knock me down. They are minor setback that the enemy tries to use to kill, steal and destroy my self image, faith and hope in Christ but my faith and hope in the Lord is that much bigger. When I feel triggered, I press into him. I seek him and I trust in his strength to carry me back into freedom. Because freedom is ultimately where I want to be with this..
So here is my writing on Our Bodies Being Temples of the Lord…
How many of you can actually say that when you look in a mirror you like what you see or when you get ready in the morning you think to yourself, WOW! I look beautiful or I look handsome? How many of you can say that you are confident about yourself, feel good about yourself and the choices that you have made in your life? If I had to guess, there is a large percentage of the people amongst us that when you look in the mirror, even if it is not every day, say to yourself, “I wish I was taller, I wish I was just a few pounds thinner, I wish my hair was straight, I wish I was better looking, I wish I never would have slept with that person, I wish I never would have taken drugs, drank, I wish, I wish…” There are many people living amongst us that dislike their appearance, that dislike their bodies and feel ashamed by the choices they have made throughout their lives. There are people that are hiding behind the pain and hurt of some of their choices, not forgiving themselves and there are some people that can not even look at themselves in the mirror, without seeing shame, hatred and disgust. There are people in our congregations, in our families and in our community that would go to extreme measures to change their appearance, body image and they would do anything to dull the shame and pain that lies deep within their souls.
The Bible makes it very clear that sexual immorality is a temptation that is always before us. We see it being discussed in the Old Testament as well as the New Testament and we see that 1 Corinthians 6:12-20 is a critical passage of Scripture in which Paul admonishes Christians to flee from sexual immorality. This is a no-non-sense response to sexual sin and Paul is clear about the consequences of such sin. Our body is the temple of the Lord. To sin in the body is to sin against the Lord Himself. Paul makes it clear that there is a spiritual bonding that occurs between people when they commit sexual sin. This is called soul ties and in essence, not only is there a spiritual bond between you and the person you have engaged in sexual activities with, but you also have a spiritual bond with whomever your partner has committed sexual sin with. That is a pretty ugly thought, isn’t it?
In addition to sexual immorality, I would like to talk about the other sins that we today are committing against our bodies and against the temple of God. I am not trying to compare apples to apples here; I am comparing apples to oranges. There are many people that have committed adultery, that have sexual relations outside of marriage and that are addicted to pornography. However, there is also the group of people that have been mishandled sexually, whether rape, sexual abuse, or being fondled, that begin hating their bodies and begin to not only act out sexually, committing sin against their bodies, they are also engaging in other forms of addictions and disorders to block out their feelings and memories. Statistics show that between 70-80% of those who have been sexually abused report excessive drug and alcohol abuse. Young girls are three times more likely to develop psychiatric disorders and eating disorders and 70% of boys seek counsel for substance abuse and suicidal thoughts. As a body of believers we need to take a step back and look at these statistics. How can we say that sexual sin is the only sin against our bodies or against the Lord? These addictions and disorders are also a sin against our bodies. Let’s look at something here for a moment. When convicted by your sins, one would try and position themselves around people and things that could help them move on and begin a healing journey. When you are involved with a sexual sin, you stop looking on the internet, you find accountability, and you cut off any strings that you may have with another person. When you are an alcoholic, you stop going to the bars, liquor stores and begin going to AA meetings. The same is true with drug addictions. You stop buying drugs and you start going to rehab. When you are dealing with an eating disorder, a direct attack on hating ones body, how do you take away ones body from oneself? Listen to me; whenever a person is dealing with an eating disorder, you have to realize that they ultimately hate their bodies and their image of their bodies is distorted. They do not see themselves the way that you see them, thin, fragile and malnourished, but the reality is that many may never. Some go into excessive eating to layer their bodies so people do not find them attractive, while others starve themselves to de-feminize themselves. They want to strip themselves of everything that has caused them so much pain and ultimately they want to kill themselves. When dealing with any of these addictions or disorders, you are also dealing with the enemy and you are dealing with the spirit of death.
So, how do we as a body of believers go about dealing with an issue that is affecting both the younger and older generations? This is an issue that is beginning at younger ages and it’s an issue that needs our attention now. Children as young as eight, nine and ten years old are beginning to get engaged sexually with one another, they are drinking, taking drugs and eating disorders are developing. Parents, I know this is a hard topic and many of you feel uncomfortable talking to your children about these issues, but if you don’t, if you do not educate them and you do not help them understand their identity and value in the Lord, someone else will and the outcome may not be so positive. Pastors, youth workers, teachers, childcare providers, make sure you create a loving, nourishing and safe environment for our youth and if you haven’t dealt with some of these issues yourself, I recommend that you begin. If you want to move ahead in your walk and your journey with Christ, you have to be honest with yourself, where you have been and let the Lord begin to heal you.
We as Christians need to come alongside these children, adolescents, and grown adults that are sinning against their bodies and we need to show them that God loves them, that their body is the body that God blessed them with and that their bodies are their temples. As Christians we must renounce the use of our bodies as instruments of unrighteousness, renounce any level of demonization that has occurred in these peoples lives as a result and rededicate their bodies to Christ as an instrument of righteousness. 1 Corinthians 3:16 says, “Don’t you know that you yourselves are God’s temple and that God’s spirit lives in you? If anyone destroys God’s temple, God will destroy him, for God’s temple is sacred and you are that temple”. As followers of Christ, we are new creations, born from above and changed from within, with values and life-styles that confront the world and clash with accepted morals. We must live Christ-centered, blameless, loving lives that make a difference for God. We need to help lead people to a place where their eyes are focused on Jesus and we need to show them what was intended for harm will now be used to glorify, worship and honor God. Romans 12:1 says, we are to offer our bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God and that this is our spiritual act of worship.
There are some people amongst us that are not confident in the way that they look and have a tendency to judge others for the way that they look. For instance, you may see someone that you believe is too thin and think to yourself that they must have an eating disorder or see someone that is overweight and think to yourself, wow that person should really try and go on a diet. Or you might have heard about someone’s past and you might think to yourself, if they only would have stayed pure and not been so easy. Listen, I am not standing up here trying to point fingers because we have all probably at some point in our lives been guilty of this way of thinking. I want to remind you that the tongue is powerful and it has destructive consequences on people’s lives. The reality is that we really do not know all that there is to know about people. You do not know why someone battled with promiscuity, if they are on a journey of recovering from alcoholism, a drug addiction or recovering from a severe eating disorder. We need to remember these people feel embarrassed and ashamed of their lives, the way they look and of their bodies. They do not view their body as a temple from God, in fact for most; they view their bodies as a living hell.
We need to stop judging others by their appearance and treating them poorly for some of the decisions they have made in their lives. Believe me, they are condemning themselves enough and they do not need someone else adding onto their already distorted image of themselves. You see before I was a Christian, I got into all of these things and eventually developed an eating disorder. I hated my body, I hated my appearance and I was slowly killing myself. But after a lot of prayer, a lot of journaling and by the grace and mercy of God, I slowly recovered. After I became a Christian, after I went through a deliverance and many people praying over me, I began to see my body as a blessing, and as a living sacrifice for the Lord. But here is the thing, I am recovered, yet I still have a distorted image of my body and my appearance. I am recovered but I get stopped constantly by people asking me if I need help or counsel for my eating disorder. We need to be different as Christians, we need to see that we are living in a broken world with a lot of hurting and broken souls out there and we need to be careful in the way that we approach, speak and love on those around us. The bottom line is this, behind each addiction, behind each act of sin, there is a hurting person that needs the healing touch of Jesus. One Friday evening watch the show Intervention on A & E and watch how these young adults are living with severe addictions to drugs, alcohol, and eating disorders. Watch how broken and hurt they are and tell me if you believe that they need Jesus in their lives. Tell me that it would help them or be beneficial for them to walk in this world, where they already do not want to be, and hear the attacks, judgments and condemnations that come from us judging their lifestyles. We need to realize that we are all sinners and we need to start loving people for whom God has created them to be. We need to come alongside some of them, being Jesus in the flesh to them, and loving them as Jesus would. We need to find out the deeper wound behind their current situations and lead them to a place a healing. Let us lead them to a place of peace, freedom and a place where they can stop hating their bodies, but instead loving their bodies. I am here to tell you that there is hope, there is freedom, there is restoration and there is forgiveness in Christ. Let us show them the light, show them the beautiful masterpiece God has created in them and help them realize that their bodies are holy, sacred and that their bodies are the temple.
I am not so sure why God has pressed me so hard to place this out here but now it is and my prayer is that this writing, these truths and the redemptive love of Jesus will bring someone one step closer to healing, one step closer to trusting the Lord and one step closer to freedom. We are not called to judge but to love. We are not called to judge but to have mercy and we are not called to judge but to show HIS grace. Lets be different. Lets love without boarders or boundaries. Lets love in such a way where people don’t have to be ashamed of their pasts, but speak about it with authority and power knowing where they have been and where they are now. Knowing their testimony will lead someone to the hope and light of the Lord. Let us be people that love unconditionally and people that others flock to because they know God is with us. Let us let go and be still enough for him to do a mighty and transforming work in us so that we can go out and speak to the masses, leading them to life everlasting. Seek, trust and have faith.
1 Corinthians 6:12-20. “Everything is permissible for me”-but not everything is beneficial. “Everything is permissible for me”- but I will not be mastered by anything. “Food for the stomach and the stomach for food”- but God will destroy them both. The body is not meant for sexual immorality, but for the Lord, and the Lord for the body. By his power God raised the Lord from the dead, and he will raise us also. Do you know that your bodies are members of Christ himself? Shall I then take the members of Christ and unite them with a prostitute? Never! Do you not know that he who unites himself with a prostitute is one with her body? For it is said, “The two will become one flesh. But he who unites himself with the Lord is one with him in spirit. Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a man commits are outside his body, but he who sins sexually sins against his own body. Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your body.”