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So the good news is that i did not need to have another bone marrow drawn and I don’t have aggressive mastocytosis that ultimately ends your life. The bad news is there is no cure for the diaease and at this point there is no further treatment so This is going to be my quality of life for right now.

I am praising him yet feel hopeless. Since the medications I am on aren’t giving me a better quality of life I will stop them and he said that heart issues I have are separate, not caused from mastocytosis. We are going to head home today. Please pray for continued healing for me. God can take this all away on a blink of an eye, and I am believing him for that. I just want to feel normal again and to look into the future just brings sadness to my heart. To know what I walked through, the physical pain I have endured and continue to endure, I just can’t grasp doing this forever. But for now I will take one day at a time and praise his high and holy name for yet another day in breathing.

I feel defeated but I now know more than ever I am not fighting the flesh, it’s in another realm, I am fighting the enemy here and I am ready to put my armor of God on and fight this battle. He will not win. I will have victory and Gods name WILL be glorified amongst the masses and all the nations for all he has done and continues to do. I serve a God that heals, redeems and sets us free and I await the day to spread my wings and soar above the mountains looking down on how far I have traveled and how far I have come.

For in my hopelessness I find extraordinary hope in him and while I feel defeated I know he has won this battle for me. He gets all the praises and he gets all the glory.