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Grieving is not about letting go. It is not about choosing happy. It is not about that Scripture verse or verses, or the multiple reasons why YOU think someone should be further along in their grieving process. It is not about you thinking they are being too negative and that they need to find the positive in the situation. It is not about you walking away because someone else’s grief is too much of a burden for you to handle. And, it is not about moving forward because for some taking that next step, even if it is a baby step, takes every ounce of energy they have. Remember the Bible states in Galatians 6:2 we are to bear one another’s burdens. In Romans 12:15 Scripture says we are to rejoice with those who rejoice and to weep with those who weep. So why are we so quick to judge, stiff arm and walk away from those who are grieving, hurting and need unconditional love most?

Grieving is HARD. It comes in waves. Everyone grieves differently and there is no timeframe on when a person should be through with it. Depending on what one has lost. Depending on how deep the pain and wounds are. Depending on the impact this loss has ruptured ones soul will determine how one grieves and the length of it. Sometimes grieving will last a lifetime. It may not have the same appearance but it will show its face and it will take you off course. That does not mean someone is weak. It does not mean they do not have faith and it does not mean they do not trust in the Lord. What is does mean is there are some losses that are just gut wrenching hard and there are some losses that you are forever changed by.

I know silence is awkward for so many individuals. Most feel they need to say something in order to have a voice, or an impact on someone else’s hurt. But the truth of it is this simple. Showing up, being by someone’s side, being a shoulder to cry on, or being a judgement free, safe landing for someone to just vomit out the chaos on is all someone may need.

Hang with someone. Hang with their tears. Hang with their pain. Hang with their doubt, confusion and brokenness. Just be still and offer the best thing a grieving heart needs, your presence.

Psalm 147:3, “He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.”